Crazycrone (crazycrone) wrote,

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"Morbidly Obese" No More...

...I've just squeaked into the plain old "obese" category. It was a thoroughly filthy day, of course, and buses were running very infrequently. Bah, at least I only had to go to Denmark Hill. Thr ride to london Bridge is much more depressing, even in decent weather. The 'bariatric nurse' came up to me in Reception, and said how well I was looking, and the doctor from 'the team' seemed quite thrilled with my excellent progress, blah blah. I was a bit disappointed, as I only shifted 10 kilos of deathfat in the last three months, but that seems to be about the maximum, without overdoing it. She asked my permission to be 'used', if they have any requests for patients to be interviewed by media, students, etc. I said OK, although, as usual I feel ambivalent. I don't want to give the impression that I believe the fat-haters are 'right', and that everyone should strive ceaselessy to be skinny. On the other hand, my weight had become such a burden as I got into my late fifties, and sixties, that I was afraid of becoming a total invalid, and dying early. I'd tried everything, and the only thing that really helped at all was regular exercise. I had so much to lose, though, that the sensible thing seemed to be to go for the op, when it was offered. It was a hideous experience, and for several days afterwards, I really thought I might be dying. After that, it still hasn't been easy. I contimue to  get nausea and  burning throat, my skin is hanging off in sheets,  AND I'm usually hungry.  I have so much less back pain, though, and even though my knees are fucked, they're not quite as bad as they were. I may look older, but I feel younger, and some of my strength has come back. I'm totally pleased with the results so far, what can I say?
R Next Door has been at her worst yet; refusing to talk, staggering around with her head in her hands mumbling, crying, etc, and she's got even scrawnier. She seems to be coming round a bit today, anyhow. I do what I can, which is virtually nil.
Watched two strange DVDs, HORS SATAN was so unbearably slow I had to hit the FF a few times, but  it was certainly weird, with elements of ORDET, TEOREMA, and BRIMSTONE AND TREACLE... An unpreposessing tramp takes up with an abused teenager, and they plod around in rural France having mystical epiphanies. It was a real slog, but mildly interesting as a curio. BULLHEAD was set in a grim rural Belgium, and followed the drug-crazed decline of a petty criminal who'd had his testicles mashed by a violent bully, as a child. It was a bit livelier than HORS SATAN, anyway. Thsy both served to confirm my feelings that living in picturesque Arcadia is a very bad idea.


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